This is for me. This post is to remind myself of a few things.
Often I sit with people, be it the people from my French class or people from the NGO I volunteer for or literally any other group of persons. And they are all talking. Always talking. Even when they run out of stuff to talk.
Sometimes, they talk about my favorite stuff. Movies and books I like or TV shows that I watch. I never really talk with people, to begin with, but I do listen. Sometimes when they stop talking at a point because they can’t remember a little detail, I smile because I do know the detail. But I keep it to myself.
At times, I get this urge of talking with them, to contribute to their conversations. It gives me anxiety. It annoys me and I hate myself at such times. I feel it itching my throat but I let it.
I need to realize that it’s okay. It’s okay to not talk with people. It’s okay to let them assume that you probably don’t know about TV shows and that you don’t read books. It’s okay if they think you are uncool. You are probably never going to meet these people again after years and they won’t remember you either. Maybe you’ll meet hundreds of such people again. It’s okay to ignore them because you already have a lot on your plate.